Friday, December 29, 2006

There are many lessons which I learnt from the mission trip:

* The passions of our homegrown missionary, florence as well as a few Thai pastors ( Known
and Ken )

* There are many people who marry as young as 14 in Northern Thailand, swapping partners
among different marriages is also a common phenomenon. Its common for men to drink day
and night and their women to work very hard to support their families due to most men not
supporting their family in anyway.

* On the other hand, the pastors there are very godly, serving the Lord with all their hearts and
staying away from all vices despite their society being so degrading. All I can say is Praise the
Lord for keeping them close to Him. Thank God that his workers obey him. Thank God that
his workers honour him.

tbc
Tonight I suddenly start to miss my comm ( Jing Jing, Aaron, Leanne n Vivian). I guess part of the reason is because I didnt go out much today.My mind isnt occupied with anything. All my memories in Chiangmai came back to me. From 18th dec flying off in the early morning with Leanne to touching down on 26th dec in Singapore with the whole team. Those days were the most meaningful in my life. Initially I couldnt adapt cos I simply dunno at thing at all, I didnt know the songs, the skit, the dance. I simply know nothing. I went to Chiangmai by faith. Throughout the few days, everyday everyone of us are travelling with faith, there was language barrier, very cold weather. Its just quite a bit to adapt to at once. But its a good experience. I saw the love of Florence for the Shan people. I saw the love of the pastors there. To be frank, I am impressed. In spite of poverty, they love God with all their hearts and they always seek God's leading. I have so much to learn from them. We r so blessed to live in a place where we can have everything we wan though its a bit stressful. I have learnt to treasure everything that I have. Nothing should be taken for granted.

Just want to do a quick recap of the things we did during the trip to chiangmai.

18th dec

- Touched down in Chiangmai after a 3 hr flight.
- Met up with Florence and Ken for the first time. ( Florence is a missionary there, very nice n
delicated to her beloved Shan people. Ken is a training pastor, passionate about God,
musically talented)
- Travelled in Chiangmai in a "Song tiao" to meet up with Aaron and the rest at Mekong Centre
before we went to an art and craft shop to for kids before heading for lunch.
- Travelled up to the village, managed to reach before night falls. But due to a bumpy journey, a
few of us had travel sickness and I ended up with a bad headache. But thank God, we had our
own first aid supplies.
- Had dinner at a church leaders' place. My first contact with traditional Thai food. That was an
experience man. I couldnt really adapt to the food but still ate la.. obviously expecially cos its
the first family meal and its freezing cold out there. Have to eat to keep warm.
- Went Carolling after dinner

tbc

Thursday, December 28, 2006

I just got back from chiangmai 2 days ago. The past few days I have been busy hanging out with OCFers thats y there was no entry. Very much this trip to chiangmai is very fruitful, I will explain more later. I came back on 26th Dec, the same day when Samuel arrived in Singapore. We met up for dinner along with Justin, phyllicia, Moses n Paul, had a good time, went to pepper lunch at taka. Its really a joy meeting up with them after so long, felt so comfortable, didnt really do much that day cos it was rainning everywhere but we still hang out till pretty late.

Then yesterday met up with them again at bugis but this time its just alfred, me, Mo n Sam cause not all of us can make it. We were like bumping around bugis market. This time round dunno y all my friends kept suggesting to go bugis market. Its so humid and too many people around but they were selling quite some good stuff so its still quite worthwhile. I m thinking to go back with some gal friends to buy my stuff cos the last few times I went was with guys so only went to see guys stuff.. its like the maid accompanying the prince to shop..haha.. but it was fun though..I realised that when we shop we tend to have quite some comments n we were laughing alot n in the end the salesgals were kind of like staring at us but that didnt bother us..haha...

I miss OCF alot since I came home, miss the fellowship, the blessings...

Saturday, December 16, 2006

Hey guess wat! Last night Ian suddenly told me that he is coming to SINGAPORE tmr! Yupz tmr, but yesterday's tmr is today isnt it? It was so funny when Ian told me he is coming last night. First of all so last min, second of all, usual la.. Ian makes demands here n there as we all know.. oh no.. he is going to kill me for all these..

Demand number 1: I want to eat spicy food!
Demand number 2: U and Moses MUST bring me around sg. ( Note the word must!!! Direct quote from our dearest IAN HONG ).

I was up till late last night cos of this dear brother. Alamak man! I was thanking God the whole night.. u know why?

Reason 1: If Ian is coming the next weekend, sorry man I am away he settle himself..
Reason 2: Thank God Moses is back, otherwise Ian tell me so last min, die man.. what m I going to do. If I cannot get Mo, I have to settle myself. So thank God for Moses. Haha.. Good thing we all stay so near otherwise even worse...Ian better thank him also, without him, he is gonna be to be homeless tonight..haha.. not really la.. can still stay my place..
Reason 3: Praise God for Sean, otherwise I cannot get Mossie also.. long story, for more details, ask me personally..hehe
Reason 4: Thank God that Ian can bunk with Mo not me.. sorry Mo, u take him.. brothers mah..haha.. like wat addielle says brotherhood..
Reason 5: Thank God we can all meet up with Eng Poh before he goes back to Penang tonight. Praise the Lord for that!

I am anticipating 3pm today when Ian arrives at Mossie's place, I will be going over later as well. We will have fun!

But I got a msg today from Ian Hong 7.30am before he went to take bus down to Singapore.

Its a typical msg from Ian.

It reads:

Prepare Towel for me.

Didnt bring.

See u there!

Guys post comments if u have any. I had a good laugh last night n this morning.

I need to call Richard before Ian comes. Not to complain ok but because Ian missed him.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Yesterday I had a great day except for some minor hiccups like forgot to take straw when I bought bubble tea, so dumb rite but it happened. So silly of me. Yesterday, I went to buy some packs of macaroni before I headed over to Leanne's place. Very much I spend most of yesterday at her place, trying to fix macaroni jewellery.

There r some steps to it:

1. Paint the macaroni. We have only got 3 colors cos I only bought 3 bottles of water color to cut
cost. So Leanne and I painted the macaroni red, green and blue.

It was quite funny, we were like amusing ourselves for the whole session. Imagine that!

2. Wait for the macaroni to dry.

3. String the macaroni using elastic string.

4. Bracelets, necklaces and anklets are done.

I should have taken pictures for momentos and also to showcase our master pieces. But we were having to much fun and I forgot. I can take the pictures on Sunday before we fly off on Monday. Those jewellery are cool man, I am sure the kids in chiangmai would love them but I guess we probably need to get more colors. That would be more fun and it would give more variety.

We experimented on paper dolls as well. Its really fun, cutting the dolls clothes, hair and stuff and decorating them. It was a session that Leanne n I discovered that we r seriously not cut to be artist or designer, its just so out for us. The designs that we made on the clothes r ok la.. but then as I told her, we wont be buying such clothes if we see them on sale in the malls, so u guys can imagine those latest designers we created..haha..

Opps, forgot to mention! I mistook the hair for the dolls for hats n sorry, I coloured them blue n green. But oh well, as wat Leanne said.. thats the latest trend..ahha.. so sotong of me!

It was fun, its like going back to being a kid doing handy craft.. I guess I can only upload the pics when I come back from Chiangmai. Be patient!!!

In all things that we do, we remember the Lord and everything is for him alone! Praise the Lord! Finally, I got my insurance almost done cos Mary responded to my email last night. Gonna get it done today..

Monday, December 11, 2006

Today is my second day in Singapore after so long. Came home quite late last night cos by the time my plane touched down it was already close to midnight. This time it was pretty much a long flight back cos I took Mas airlines, but the flight was ok la.. just tired.. but Sally, Lydia, Victor n Joel was on the same plane so it was ok. But when the plane touched down at Kuala Lumpur we had to go separate ways. Sally took another flight back to Kuching, Lydia had a flight back to KK, Victor well, he got home the fastest among us, Joel took another plane back to India while for me, I took a connecting flight back to Singapore.

The connecting flight was quite unpleasant but thank God it was only for 55 mins. It was quite stuffy n there were some passengers complaining.. argh.. Dunno for what reason n I had to listen to Malay for like 10 hrs in total.. ah.. dunno what they were saying.. doesnt matter anymore thou..hehe..

Had a chat with Leanne this morning for updates on our mission team. Gonna do handicraft with her n Desiree tmr at her place. But when I went out to purchase the materials today, I was caught in the heavy rain, so terrible, even until now my head still spins though I showered almost immediately after I got home.

I am trying to adapt myself to everything now, lifestyle so different..

Oh! Help me Please!!!

Saturday, December 09, 2006

If you’re walking through the valleys

And there are shadows all around

Do not fear, He will guide you

He will keep you safe and sound

He has promised to never leave you

Nor forsake you


Though I may not understand

All the plans You have for me

My life is in Your hand

Through the eyes of faith

I can clearly see

Friday, December 08, 2006

There is mixed feelings within me.. I really dunno if I wan to go home or not.. I will still go home regardless of what I really feel.. I guess one of my main motivation of going home is because I m going chiangmai with leanne.. that really make me want to go home faster.. In another 2 days time, I will be home, I will be touching down Sunny Singapore.. This time, I am taking Malaysian Airlines... couldnt get a flight for Singapore Airlines n Quantas.. But good thing this time, I am flying back with Sally.. that would make my flight more enjoyable n something more acceptable..

I am looking forward to seeing leanne. Havent seen her since Sept. I havent really known her for long but we connect well. I guess the link between us is God and the mission trip we are going for. She has been handling the stuff for me back home.. my travel insurance, my airticket, my backpack, my medical forms, my OMF fees.. Thank You so much.. Seriously I dunno who can do all those for me if not for u.. Nothing can really express my thankfulness.. Really want to meet up with her quickly when I come home..

I am looking forward to seeing Tracy too. I met her during OCF Sydney Annual Retreat at Blue Mountains. She has become a close friend whom I share my stuff with. Gonna see her soon, the coming friday for dinner..

The past day, I have been packing my stuff to get ready to go home but somehow, my heart is unsettled. I thought of different people, from OCF to Uni coursemates, its like a powerpoint slide show. All the flashbacks.. then it dawned on me.. what can I really do for 2 months in Singapore? How should I really spend my time? What does God want me to do for next year? How can I juggle everything? Where actually m I? I am lost, yeah, I am.

For now, praying that God will continue to guide me n guard me in all things I do.
Praying for my mission comm - for God to consistently keep them from all danger and God's protection to cover them through n through.
Praying for God's annointing as I prepare the worship n devotion materials on the coming Monday and Tuesday.
Praying as I prepare my heart to go home.

A while ago, I told Paul that I may not colead with him for Romans Book Study next yr. Just last week, I told him that. I was feeling very down at that time thats y I said that. I know God is calling me ( Refer Nov 19 Blog Entry ) but I feel weak at the same time. I dunno how to handle bs along with all my other committments. Praying that God will guide me in my decisions.

He is the only one that can keep me secured.

Thursday, December 07, 2006

This year's christmas is gonna be a special one for me. I will be in Chiangmai doing Christmas Rally, sharing the love of God with little children, something which I have never done before. It will be a unique one.. My heart is just full of anticipation and excitement!

I celebrated christmas once this year with my connect group already at our last cell meeting for the year. We had a huge feast, exchanging of presents. I miss them, especially when I look at the pics, the memories r kept within me..
I went out today. Went to uni to do some stuff, then went T-bar with Tina. I guess today is the last time I will be seeing her here and seriously I dunno when we can actually meet again. Thinking about it is quite sad. She is someone whom I have shared alot with. Someone who opened up her heart to me and someone whom I opened up my heart to as well. We have shared alot together, times when we r down, times when we r happy. Last week we went to send Samuel and Addielle off. Its amazing that none of us cried. The only reason is we controlled, at least I did. For Addielle, I will be seeing her soon. It isnt that bad. She promised to meet up in Singapore when I come back from Chiangmai. For Samuel, he will still be back next yr. But still life without them is different. Been talking to addielle online since she went home.

Most of the OCFers are still in Melbourne though convention is over. I miss them, nothing to deny about. I was just looking at the photos that samuel recently posted on his blog. I was drawn to the pics taken at the airport before addielle n samuel went off as well as pics taken at our christmas party this yr. Our final connect meeting.. The happy n sad times, I do cherish.. For some people my concern for them is hidden in my heart n secured in my prayers to God. Though I write so much on my blog, there are still some hidden stuff in my heart.. I guess everyone has their own secrets.

My heart is heavy, heavy about going home, going home means that I m not under OCF's cover. What will become of me? Who can support me? Will my relationship with God be as strong as ever? Clinging tightly to God.. Because thats the only way I can live my life in glory of him forever.. He is the reason that I live!

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

I was reading all my previous emails just now. Usually I get alot of emails everyday from various people for various reasons. There are some emails I dun reply at all, not because they r not important but because I was only browsing through them due to the limited time I have. I was looking at all the emails from everyone just now especially those sent by my committee ( those from leanne, jing and Aaron ). I miss them. Most of them are in Chiangmai now. Praying for their safety n God's guidance and protection to be with them, for them to seek the Lord in every step they take.

I came across this song among my many emails.

Chorus

He who began a good work in you
He who began a good work in you
Will be faithful to complete it
He’ll be faithful to complete it
He who started the work
Will be faithful to complete it in you

Verse

If the struggle you’re facing
Is slowly replacing your hope
With despair
Or the process is long
And you’re losing your song
In the night
You can be sure that the Lord
Has His hand on you
Safe and secure
He will never abandon you
You are His treasure
And He finds His pleasure in you

Its a song with meaningful words. A song which will lift u up in times of despair.

Pray with me as I prepare for the worship sessions.
Pray with me as I prepare for the devotions.
Pray with me as I trust God.
Pray with me as I continue to seek Him above all things.
A few days ago, I was talking to Sean online, told him that I will be looking for a church to settle in when I come back to Singapore. He invited me to his church, Church of Singapore. I m considering it. All my friends' churches r so far back home. Distance isnt what I am considering, but I need a place where I can be rooted when I can grow spiritually for the next 2 months before I return to adelaide.

There are a few churches on my mind. Not really sure where I will be going for service yet. Praying about it still. This trip home will be fruitful. Plans are being lined ahead already. Starting with going for new creation bible study next thursday. I am excited about it.. it will be a place where I can learn, a place where I can grow.

I am excited about going home, I am excited about preparing for devotions n worship songs for the trip to chiangmai, I am excited about studying Romans, I am excited about everything including studying next year. I am excited about christmas..

I can say now that I have fully recovered. I feel happy again. Actually to be exact I am happy again since yesterday. I m happy to be able to see my family again, to be able to go for bs, to be able to be myself, to be able to learn n grow.

For everything I thank God, I know everything happens for a purpose. My future is held in the hands of God.

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Its a new day. I just spoke with Leanne just now, someone dear to me from home, someone I met in Sydney, someone I can relate to and someone whom I know cares for me.

What she said brightened up my day. She is joinning mission team slightly later and she asked me if I want to fly with her to Chiangmai next week. My heart is so excited again. I feel alive again. Yes, its the feeling of revival in the spirit.

I could see the door opening now.. I could see it again..

Flight not confirmed yet.. to be confirmed soon..

Sunday, December 03, 2006

I want to be left alone for this week. No sms, no emails please. I am already starting to feel better and I dun wish to go back to the depression state where I was the past week so please, leave me alone. I will be ok.

I dun want to be blunt but I have been getting too many calls, smses n emails the past week and I have been agitated and I m on a rollercoaster. What I need now is peace and comfort from God. Too much of everything brings hurt to some extend and it complicates my mind as well.

I appreciate all who have shown concern, all who have spent time accompanying me. I will be fine. I need time to loosen up myself n get back to a normal life.

There is only 1 person I want to keep with me during this time and he is God and God alone. I can only hear from Him when things around me quieten down only then can I hear him whisper to me.

Let me hear his whisper.. let me hear him speak..

Saturday, November 25, 2006

Today, I found myself with God once again. This week is the second week after my exams. This week I must confess that I didnt pray much. I admit I am slack. Noone can pass any judgement on me because we have been there n done that. No matter how senior u r in leading bible study or even leading a church. We have been there still. I was a backslider a few years back before I came to adelaide. I remember the sermon that Uncle Vincent preached last sunday at AACC. He preached about a man who was once a backslider but still God could turn the situation around and use him mighty to influence others. There are some of us brothers n sisters whom have backslided before but now we have changed because God changed us. These few days, God has been calling me by name n urging me to seek his face. But I did not come back to him until this morning, I came home to him. I went back to my Daddy. I went back not because he is urging me. I went back willingly. I went back because I need him to live each day. I need him to survive. But more importantly, its because I love Him n he is God. For some of u, u make not understand. Its not something that can be explained. I went back. I am secure again.

I confessed to Janice how I really felt today. I am guilty for turning my back against God though it was for just a few days. I am guilty. Yes, I am but not anymore because I went back to Him. I know he will forgive me n cleanse me once again. Just now Li Chang send me a link to the sermon which he was listening to. I listened to it n God used it to speak to me.

He spoke about prayer is like breathing. When u pray, u r breathing the air of heaven. When we pray, we are adding oil to our lamp. He asked me to come back to Him. He promised that I can find him if I seek Him with all my heart. All these I read in my bible many times before but sometimes they still slip my mind. But in that instant, he strengthened it all. He magnified it all. Indeed, he is my God. He could perceive my thoughts. I can never hide from him.

God is using everyone around me. He is. In ways that seem simple but its also easy for us to stray away. But God always has a way out for us. For most of today, I spent listening to the song "we are the reason", mediating on the words n allowing it to sink in me n letting God speak to me. I wan to listen to him. I REFUSE to rebel against Him. I am turning my face towards him again. He has allowed me to turn my face towards him again. Again, I can say I love u.. Again I can say I obey u.. Again I can say I seek u.. Again I can say, Father lead me n guide me.. Daddy u r there.. loving me.. cherishing me..

Today I am so happy.. I am so refreshed by God.. Noone can give me what he can give me. Noone..yes, noone.

Continuously annoint me with ur oil, continuously fill my lamp as I continuously seek u, Father.
There is sth that I want to blog about.. something that God spoke to me about.. But now I find it hard to put into words..hmm.. let me organise my thoughts then I will be back..Be patient..
I am listening to the song my committee back in Sydney have chosen for our team.. A month ago, they emailed the mp3 of this song to me. But all I did was read their mail but I did not listen to the song. I am guilty, yes, I was. There is no excuse I should give myself. No excuse is acceptable.

We have chosen the song entitled : We are the reason by Kaffe Matthews

As little children
We would dream of Christmas morn
Of all the gifts and toys
We knew we'd find
But we never realized
A baby born one blessed night
Gave us the greatest gift of our lives

We were the reason
That He gave His life
We were the reason
That He suffered and died
To a world that was lost
He gave all He could give
To show us the reason to live

As the years went by
We learned more about gifts
The giving of ourselves
And what that means
On a dark and cloudy day
A man hung crying in the rain
All because of love, all because of love
I've finally found the reason for living
It's in giving every part of my heart to Him
In all that I do every word that I say
I'll be giving my all just for Him, for Him

He is my reason to live

I like this song, not just because the music is nice but because the lyrics is meaningful to me. The first time I heard this song, I am touched by the lyrics. I know its a song not chosen by a human but by God. I can see his hand moving among us. This song ministered to me, to my needs, God used this song to meet me where I am, Indeed he is there.

We are indeed precious in God eyes and it reminds us of how Christ had to endure the cross for our sins. He is the reason we live and let us continue to live it for Him.

The following passage is shared by Aaron, my dearest team leader for our coming mission trip.

(John 15:1-17)
1"I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinedresser.
2Every branch of mine that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit.
3Already you are clean because of the word that I have spoken to you.
4Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me.
5I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.
6If anyone does not abide in me he is thrown away like a branch and withers; and the branches are gathered, thrown into the fire, and burned.
7If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.
8By this my Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit and so prove to be my disciples.
9As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Abide in my love.
10If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father's commandments and abide in his love.
11These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full.
12"This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you.
13Greater love has no one than this, that someone lays down his life for his friends.
14You are my friends if you do what I command you.
15No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you. 16You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, he may give it to you.
17These things I command you, so that you will love one another.

I want to abide in you Father, YES, I will..

Friday, November 24, 2006

I didnt do anything much yesterday. I was resting most of the time. Half the time I was thinking about various people, about the change they had throughout the year whether is it negative change or positive change. Its unwise for me to think that much n that far. But still I went that direction. The other half of the time I was either reading or watching drama.

I need some space for myself. I really feel like going home this time. I miss home. My flight home will be on 2nd dec. I just spoke with Ziren yesterday. In another week, I will be home. I can see her soon.

This trip home, I got to find a new church because I will not go back to my previous church. Reasons which I will not cite here. This trip home, I yearn to have discipleship. I already approached someone about it and I am hoping for a favourable reply. The summer break, I really need some proper rest in order to be ready for the challenges for next year. There is so much I want to do at home. So much so much...

My results r not out yet. Its really too slow this time. Waiting.. Waiting..

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

The last 2 days were fulfilling days.. 2 days of joy, peace n laughter.. Yesterday I met up with Laza for lunch, I havent been talking to him for a while cos we hardly meet, being in 2 different OCF centres. There was much catching up at Primo cafe. In that 2 hrs, I was greatly encouraged n lifted by his sharing. I am glad to have a brother who is supportive of me in his prayer. I am blessed to know someone who is keen on missions, someone whose heart is for the lost, who is obedient and submissive to God. I shared what was on my mind with him..

Met up with keith for coffee as well. I always desire quality time with my friends. Quality time as in time spent talking abt deep stuff.. not the usual daily life..

Went west terrace after that to cook with Mo n Karen. Its fun cooking with them. There was much laughter but the highlight of yesterday was our christmas party at night over at Deb's place. There were loads of great food prepared by great chefs..Haha.. There was exchange of gifts as well. I got to bug Samuel for the pictures man.. He has got them all..

Came home so late last night.. almost couldnt wake up this morning.. Thank God I wasnt late for breakfast, otherwise yoshi will be waiting too long man..hehe.. had breakie with yoshi at cibo today before prayer meet... finally had the sendimental infusion tea that I always wanted to try.. taste quite good..

I feel so tired now.. been up and about almost 2 whole days.. got to get some rest..
The Five Love Languages

Your primary love language is probably Quality Time

with a secondary love language being Acts of Service.

Complete set of results

Quality Time: 10

Acts of Service: 7

Physical Touch: 5

Receiving Gifts: 4

Words of Affirmation: 4

Sunday, November 19, 2006

Today so many things happened.. Where should I start?

I woke up early today.. about 6.20am. I slept over at Samantha's place last night. Had a long long chat with her on many topics. Exchanged thoughts.. after not meeting or talking for more than a month..there is much to catch up.. I enjoyed the time.. chat till 2am then we went to bed..

I was at yoshi's place this morning.. was with addielle and yoshi.. we were deep frying the fish fingers n nuggets.. but we were chatting most of the time.. sharing our thoughts.. I laid my thoughts n struggles before them just as I laid them bare before God.. I laid them bare before my sisters....I made no effort to hide.. no effort at all.. I love the both of them.. alot alot.. they know I do and God knows..

I shared with them the struggles of the past week.. how God wanted me to retreat from everything so that I could commune with him.. How I desire him and how much I needed him n the rest he could give me that noone else can give.. God spoke to me everyday in the past week in times when I least expect him.. he whispered something in my ears.. he wanted my whole heart not part of my heart..

2 days ago was friday, I spoke with Aaron, Paul, Ivy n Mo regarding bs leading next yr. I said that I do not want to lead bs next yr.. I said all sorts of things which now I find very self centred. I saw their anxiety in some of their faces but I didnt care.. in my mind, I wanted to do discipleship next yr.. I wan to concentrate on building myself up.. I want to go onto a higher level with God.. I needed a year off to rest so that I can proceed at greater extends n greater measures with God.. My heart desires to do more for him.. I wanted to consider bsf next year.. I wanted to consider the mission trip which siew wai is planning.. so much stuff I wan to accomplish but at my own pace. I need enough rest. God doesnt want me to strain myself or tire myself out from ministry.. My final reply to them was I will only lead if I get clear instructions from God.. otherwise I will take a year of rest from ministry.. N I mean every word I say..

Even up till 8.30am, when I was talking to addielle n yoshi.. I was still emphasising on what I said on friday.. My mind was still set on not leading bs..n I still had several demands on my group, my coleader or leader and the study we r doing.. I was just so demanding.. until I cannot stand myself also..haha.. but God has his way around me and indeed his ways r higher than mine.

I went to AACC with yoshi this morning.. I was immersed in the worship n even now the sermon n how God spoke through the sermon is still in my heart, my mind n my soul. I am still saturated with his word..

That sermon by Uncle Vincent fired up my spirit once again. God used him mighty to speak to me. I was touched to the point that I broke down in the end.

This is what God said to me at 10.30am:

Pris, this is my will in ur life to lead bible study next yr. I will prepare u in the next 3 months. I will give u more rest than u need. Seek me always, I will be sufficient for u. Trust me and come to me.

His words r still ringing in my mind. I know its a confirmation from God after being praying n thinking abt it the past week. I knew this thought is not from me.

I broke down n cried.. I willingly submitted to his will. I choose not to run away. Its foolish to run from the Almighty God. At that moment, Yoshi, keith and Aaron was with me. Yoshi was visibly touched by God too. Myra saw us.. she came over put her hands on my shoulder n prayed for me..

Just want to do a comparison between Pris at 8.30am n Pris at 10.30am

8.30am

I am unwilling to lead bs.. not only unwilling to be the leader.. not willing to be the coleader as well ( I was determined on taking one year of rest )

10.30am

After God spoke, I was willing to be used by him. I dun mind being the leader, the coleader, the member or even his servant in all aspects. ( As wat Aaron said, thats a 180 degrees change)

8.30am

I was only willing to work with certain leaders cos I have always needed a leader whom I can learn from and I m demanding of my leader, very demanding in fact. I respect all leaders but some leaders I respect more n I always observe them n I have greater expectations.

10.30am

All of a sudden, I am willing to work with any leader, be in any group.

I m amazed by this change, so is Aaron n yoshi.. its a huge change n only God can make that change.. I heed his calling.. I choose to obey him.. I choose to trust him, to love him, to give him control..

Its the best thing I did after the exams.. God is wonderful.. so wonderful.. he deserves it all..

My mind is so peaceful.. indeed it is.. after been so turmoil for so long.. as wat I told lynette the last few days it was a emotional shipwrecked.. I was struggling with the decisions I should make.. But God has made the choice for me.. I delight in him..

I am so motivated to live life to bring glory to him.

Thursday, November 16, 2006

My exams are over.. Yes, they r over.. But I am not relieved.. My heart is weary n burdened.. My heart is burning for the mission trip that is coming up in December.. I dun want to stay in Adelaide not in Singapore either.. The trip has been on my mind for so long.. not just since July this year but since many years ago when God first impressed it on my heart.. But now frankly I am worried abt my results. I am worried that it will hinder me.. I am worried that it will change my mind.. I hate this .. I did my best. This year I studied more than I ever did in my entire life.. and I did worse than I ever did in my entire life.. But still this is the happiest year of my life..this is the year where I relied on God more than I ever did before.. this is the year he mould me n refined me again n again.. where I seeked his face again n again.. repeated in the nights I cried only to him.. I longed to see his face.. I longed to be with Him.. I longed for his will to be done in my life..

I praise him for guiding me in all my decisions.
I praise him for bringing me to adelaide.
I praise him for giving me trials and showing me his glory.
I praise him for his everlasting love and sustaining me till now.
I praise him for changing me so much.
I praise his presence in my life.
I praise him for the person he is.
I praise him for all my friends and family.

BUT above all, I praise HIM because he is God. He is in Control.

This link below is the link to the blog for our mission trip in Dec. Do check regularly for more updates.

http://ocfsydneymissions06.blogspot.com/

--

The last few days, I have been spending time with leny, kehong, yao chai, jessie, kiki, weijian, and their housemates. I spent the bulk of my time with them.. I just got to know them recently but they had brought joy in my life.. I was supposed to have dinner with them last night.. Kehong n yao chai r cooking last night.. but in the end I didnt go.. I dun feel well.. both spiritually n physically.. I needed much rest.. I wanted to spend time with them but still I couldnt go.. I knew I cannot stretch myself anymore otherwise it would be drainning for me.. Kiki left for home last night too.. I miss her.. really.. thought I dunno her for long but everytime I see her, my heart is so warmed by her.. hopefully I can still see her next year..

--

Lydia n I went to Marion on tuesday but dunno y.. both of us didnt really enjoy the trip.. especially me.. I just was not in the mood to shop.. but we did talk alot n I shared with her many things.. I am glad she was with me then.. yes.. I was glad..

We went to samuel's place after shopping. Mel was cooking for Mo, leeping n yoshi. I wanted to help but in the end didnt help much. I was just sinking on the sofa too tired to get up.. I was mostly stoning.. until Aaron came then we talked quite a bit.. so largely.. tuesday was spent with the Wong family ( Lydia and Aaron.. hahaha).

Went with Mel to deliver dinner n fruits for them.. Leeping wasnt home.. hope she isnt too stressed.. Saw Mo n Frank.. Both looked happy n less stressed.. so glad.. then popped by yoshi's place.. she looked tired.. but for all of them now exams r over.. they made it.. God is faithful..

Then after that I went back to Leny's place to cook dinner.. I enjoy cooking dinner for them.. I just feel so at home at her place.. I like their company.. I will definitely miss them when I go home..

--

Yesterday wasnt a good day for me.. I woke up feeling torn apart.. Thank God, Mel was on msn.. I just poured out my heart to her.. she has been there for me the last few days... giving me advice and praying for me.. I am very comforted.. God has been speaking to me through her and samuel.. reaffirming wat God has already placed in my heart..

I felt better after that.. went out with samuel n lydia in the afternoon.. shared with samuel much stuff God has for me.. But after that I was distracted .. my thoughts were with God.. I had to leave so that I could be alone.. I recalled many things in that 1 hr I was away.. many many things that God blessed me.. many many things he brought me through.. it was as if God placed them on powerpoint slides.. showing me how he brought me through everything n he is sufficient for me.. I was in tears in the end.. he planted some scriptures in my heart the past week.. planted them deep in my heart n he was consistently reminding me of them.

I came home for a long rest after that..

Hebrews 13:5

"Never will I leave you;
never will I forsake you."

Jeremiah 29:11

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

Proverbs 3:5-6

"Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make your paths straight.

--

Gonna go back n sleep again soon. Meeting Tina for lunch today.. need her advice on some stuff.. need to discuss.. need to pray.. but in the morning.. I got to go n defer my airticket.. Hope to fly on 30th Nov home instead.

Afternoon will be fun.. meeting at samuel's place with Mey, Mel n lydia.. for christmas party planning for our connect grp.. it will be a great time..

Think I will be home early tmr.. got to tidy up my room.. oh so messy..

Saturday, November 11, 2006

This morning just as I was waking up.. God reminded me of this verse. His timing is perfect.

Philippians 4:6

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

He made me still before Him.. therefore I will..

I was mediating on Psalm 139 before bed last night n the words truely comforted me n I slept well knowing that God is on the throne. He will not let any harm come to me.

1 O LORD, you have searched me
and you know me.

2 You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.

3 You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.

4 Before a word is on my tongue
you know it completely, O LORD.

5 You hem me in—behind and before;
you have laid your hand upon me.

6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.

7 Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?

8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.

14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.

15 My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,

16 your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.

Everything has been planned by God.. N he will guide us through it.. stand firm under all trials and in all ur ways seek n acknowledge Him.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

The last few days for me was horrendous.. All I had was God with me.. nothing else.. actually he indeed is sufficient for me.. been alive after these few days is great.. I had my first paper on Monday.. not a fantastic paper.. Sunday night n Monday morning I was encouraged by several sms n calls which I received. I had a peaceful night of sleep after praying n committing everything onto the Lord. I know that a lot of people r praying n more importantly I have the confidence that God is there. today had my second paper which was much better.. in the sense I have more confidence that I can survive.. the last few days I only did a few things.. eat ( only when I am really hungry.. but not much appetite still.. skipped dinner last night though Leny cooked for me.. just totally had no appetite at all..), sleep, study, pray ( prayed so much.. cos I was worried not only for myself but for some people whom I am concerned about n whom I have always kept in my prayers consistently, I being a human seriously I cant help them only God can. I flooded my mind with Psalms.. especially during the times when I was almost breaking down..times when I refuse to turn to anyone except God n God alone). I was anxious.. yes .. I was.. Last night I was actually hoping that someone who would sms me a word of encouragement.. noone did.. but leny was there with me the whole night.. I really appreciate it.. it means just too much to me.. sometimes during the exam nights I would get really stressed n uptight at night.. I would feel scared though I know that I need not be ( thats wat I would call the panic attack).. because my future is determined by God who knows my every step.. I shouldnt panic at all.. not at all.. there is nothing I can do to change the wonderful and perfect future which God had already determined for me though there would be hurdles upfront.. I should n I will march forward.. the eternal reward is at the end.. this morning I had breakfast with jessie.. she had a paper today too so we decided to go off together with another 3 others from the village..so had a cool walk with them to the exam hall.. I wasnt stressed.. just prayed along the way and submit everything to God.. indeed I have tried my best.. if God willing... he will let me through it..

To Mo n Deb, thanks for the sms this morning.. u guys brightened my day ..

Many people flood my mind the last 2 weeks.. I guess u know who u r .. the people I called .. the people I sms or msn.. its u guys..

I cooked fish porridge just now.. n herbal soup with pork n carrot..hehe.. need to have some good food.. starting revision on chemistry soon.. in an hour.. got to rest my brain first..

Psalms 18

1 I love you, O LORD, my strength.

2 The LORD is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer;
my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge.
He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.

3 I call to the LORD, who is worthy of praise,
and I am saved from my enemies.

6 In my distress I called to the LORD;
I cried to my God for help.
From his temple he heard my voice;
my cry came before him, into his ears.

17 He rescued me from my powerful enemy,
from my foes, who were too strong for me.

18 They confronted me in the day of my disaster,
but the LORD was my support.

28 You, O LORD, keep my lamp burning;
my God turns my darkness into light.

31 For who is God besides the LORD ?
And who is the Rock except our God?

32 It is God who arms me with strength
and makes my way perfect.

33 He makes my feet like the feet of a deer;
he enables me to stand on the heights.

34 He trains my hands for battle;
my arms can bend a bow of bronze.

35 You give me your shield of victory,
and your right hand sustains me;
you stoop down to make me great.

Saturday, November 04, 2006

I am captured by the words.. by the song.. by u my Lord..

THE POTTER’S HAND


Beautiful Lord, wonderful Savior

I know for sure all of my days are

Held in Your hand


Crafted into Your perfect plan

You gently call me into Your presence

Guiding me by Your Holy Spirit

Teach me dear Lord

To live all of my life through Your eyes


I’m captured by Your holy calling

Set me apart

I know You’re drawing me to Yourself

Lead me Lord I pray


Take me, mold me, use me, fill me

I give my life to the Potter’s hand

Call me, guide me

Lead me, walk beside me

I give my life to the Potter’s hand

Friday, November 03, 2006

I may have hurt someone unintentionally today. I saw someone that I didnt expect to see and I wasnt in a condition to see. I am feeling all the stress now and I really didnt want to meet anyone that would add more stress to me. Certain times things happen but we dunno it. I really need to protect myself at this moment from all external things thats affects my spirit. It wasnt easy for me to decide to come to OCF tonight. I m down.. very stressed n there is still loads to be done.. I am afraid ..very afraid in fact.. But still I came .. noone forced me.. its by the spirit of God. I really felt led in tonight's worship. My tears just flowed. God is just so near to me. My spirit is comforted n I feel ready to carry on..

I enjoyed tonight.. from the worship to devotion to praying with keith.. felt the presence of God evident .. Praying by the spirit .. I know u r ever there and ever for me..

For those having exams tmr.. we are praying for u.. for Justin, Ian, Kazu, Handy, Leny and Phyllicia..

Mel, thanks so much.. what u did through the spirit for me is beyond description.. I love the Psalm ( student version ) and all the songs.. Thanks dear..

*HugZ*

Another Note to all : Psalm 34 has always been my favourite Psalm.. Have a look.. meditate on it.. It will do u good..

Thursday, November 02, 2006

People comment abt me alot.. whether in front or behind my back.. I know it.. it may seem to them that its within 4 walls or just among them.. but somehow news just reaches my ears on and off.. I find it a joke..comments abt all sorts of stuff.. comparing this n that.. wats constructive abt that?? I find it a total joke.. just because I am a real person who says whats on my mind .. I get all this crap.. amusing I find.. while on the other hand .. the rest of the look so strong in spirit n in mind.. I dun believe all that.. its just deceptive feelings we all get.. We are just afraid to look vulnerable..

I withdrew from some people this sem not cos I dun have time.. but rather the words are destructive n I have a choice not to listen to people who compares me with so and so.. or instill in me negative thoughts which do not come from God..

I rather save myself from such nonsense.. Waste time only..I will not destroy my day because of them.. Silly..

Saturday, October 28, 2006

Thursday, October 26, 2006

Its gonna be friday soon.. last day of uni lessons for this year.. the last few days was choking me seriously.. so stressed.. no time to eat n sleep.. was almost living like a zombie.. but its over now.. sat for the immuno test today.. it wasnt too bad.. but i did make some really super duper stupid mistake.. I bet when Chris Wong marks my paper he would be laughing his head off.. the receptor qns.. all the 3 receptors that was supposed to come to my head but they unfortunately didnt.. supposed to be B cell, T cell and Fc receptor but I wrote crap.. nvm..that was 3 marks down the drain..

Afternoon session was my prac exam.. I was calm ..very calm in fact.. had a crappy microscope that couldnt move down at all .. imagine only can move up a little bit and to the sides.. oh man.. that was horrible.. but I knew sth was wrong so I changed microscope.. cos otherwise I couldnt do viable count n view the gram stains ..that would be horrible.. everything was fine.. n I actually finished early.. but the haemagglutination part wasnt fantastic cos I had a wrong result.. but thank God the negative control turned out well otherwise my demostrator would have marked me down.. cos the results would be rendered invalid if the negative control was rubbish...so things didnt go too wrong.. just something minor..hehe..

Just want to thank all those who r praying for me especially for yoshi, danny n samuel.. really sweet people.. Chocolate for yoshi tmr for being a sweet darling.. she rang me this morning to wake me up.. chocolate for u dear..

I just finished my prac report.. 8 pages in 4 hrs.. Thanks yin ying n Linh.. u guys r of great help.. gonna rewrite my summative tute then I am done..

Tmr is gonna be a good day.. gonna celebrate yiyi's birthday.. though a late celebration.. its a gathering before exams.. a time of bonding n love.. love u all.. hope u will like the dress I got u..

I wonder if tmr we have another sabo session for Mossie? Will upload Paul n Mossie sabo pics soon.. Those taken at glenelg..

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

I am very stressed n impatient today.. I think I did offend some people. Though I know they understand.. I am still very displeased with myself.. I have been trying to study but having been doing quality work..

This week is hectic with 1 quiz n 1 exam on thursday..n 2 assignments due on friday.. I dunno wat to do.. just try my best...

Please pray for me.. I need all the prayers..

Gonna study in Uni till late from now on.......

If I offended u, please forgive me.. I didnt mean it.. I am just short of time..

Exhausted..

Monday, October 23, 2006

Getting along with people is never easy..

I try to be nice to everyone.. but some people just simply go overboard n step all over me.. tolerance has its limits... n its repeatedly the same few people.. its getting very annoying..

I dun understand y some people r so nasty n hard to communicate with..

Tolerating still...

When I want to be nasty to them in return.. I think twice.. I dunno how to be nasty.. Its God that stops me... otherwise I would have lashed out at them...

Thursday, October 19, 2006

8 Things/Attitudes I Dislike

1. People who are unappreciative and full of negative comments.
2. People who are bossy.. they love to tell me what to do n I will rebel against them.
3. When my whole day is lessons from 9am to 6pm nonstop..no lunch break
4. When I am busy, someone still comes n ask me to cough out my answers ( Cant u see that I
am stressed?)
5. When I have to fix my meals when I cannot even manage all my other stuff
6. When people insist I go for certain things ( I dun believe in being forced. I will go if I am
willing)
7. When I have 3 or more assignments to hand up in a day
8. When people take me for granted ( even right now so many people r doing this)

I know this post is grumpy.. Cos I am right now.. This moment.. But I m being real to everyone.. Come on.. who likes to be treated this way???

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

At 9.30pm last night, I was hurt, upset n to a certain degree mad after reading an email. I am no longer angry now, neither m I hurt or upset because God brought forgiveness in my heart within 2 hrs last night. I think its amazing especially the content which I replied in that email directly after I read it. It didnt show any sight of anger but more of love and reasoning. It isnt because I was afraid. No..it wasnt at all. It was out of respect for the other person. Its deep respect that I have in my heart. It is God woven words not of mine. I cannot post here what I wrote. But I did show someone the content, a godly brother who knows both of us and understand us.

That moment I didnt know what to do. I just needed someone to assure me that I am fine. That moment all confidence is lost. In that few sentences in that email, it shattered entirely all. I actually felt inferior.. can u imagine, Prissy who is loud, confident, outgoing suddenly become a mouse feeling so useless and extra..my goodness.. I changed my msn nick last night and immediately a few people msn me but I only shared my pain n hurt entirely with a close brother, his reply really comforted me.

Brother: Your reaction is good! God will be happy!
Me (Feels comforted and happy that I did the right thing )
Brother: really well done! I am impressed by ur reply email.

Of late there were quite a few people who told me that I have changed for the better. I can control my anger more n I am more tolerant. Initially I didnt agree with them that I have change, at least not significant change. From Janice to Siew wai as well as to some other brothers, I am delighted to have changed but it isnt any of my works but of God and God alone! 2 weeks ago, after OCF Joanna came to hug me and she encouraged me. I still remember it till now cos its important to me. Its important for us to encourage one another in love. We all need a pat on our back!

I no longer feel inadequate now because my confidence is in God not in man! I also forgave that person completely to the extend that I prayed for him last night and I seek God ernestly to bless him aboundantly. I cannot imagine how I managed to do this. Just 2 hours ago I was mad with this person, 2 hrs later I can actually forgive and seek God for his blessing on this person. God is just so amazing. I can never be that forgiving until God intervenes!

I am glad I honoured God!

Colossians 3:13

"Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. "

Finally, I hope we all can lead by EXAMPLE n SENSITIVITY not POSITION. Let us learn together...

Sunday, October 08, 2006

Saturday, October 07, 2006

Doing Good to All

Galations 6

1Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently. But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted. 2Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. 3If anyone thinks he is something when he is nothing, he deceives himself.

No Christian should ever think that he or she is totally independent and doesn’t need help from others, and no one should feel excused from the task of helping others. The body of Christ – the church – functions only when members work together for the common good. Do you know someone who needs help? Is there a Christian brother or sister who needs correction or encouragement? Humbly and gently reach out to that person ( John 13:34-35 )
1 John 3

1How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him.

As believers, our self-worth is based on the fact that God loves us and calls us his children. We are his children now, not just sometime in the distant future. Knowing that we are his children should encourage us to live as Jesus did.

Are we living the life as Jesus lived?
Yesterday was an awesome day! It was Moon cake Festival and guess wat I actually celebrated Moon cake Festival with 4 different gangs this year. First, had mooncake in Sydney over at Clarence place, next Mooncake with amanda and my dearest coursemates over at Botanical Gardens the following week, and yesterday had Mooncake over at Leny and Jessie's place and finally the finale for last night was at Torrens River after OCF with Moses, Ian, Leeping, Samuel, Karen, Yoshi, Joannies, Paul and Keith. We had a cool time man! Did something different this time. Fancy adult children playing with lanterns, candles and bubbles ( Thanks to Ivy, Joannies and Keith for supplying us our play stuff! )

For me, Mooncake Festivals have always been nothing interesting until I came to adelaide. I should say that I never knew or remembered the festival to be associated with something fun.
Last year during Moon cake Festival, we had this celebration over at Ringwood with mooncakes and dessert and some close friends. This year is more happening and more child-like and also more memorable and enjoyable as well.

Also dinner was great. At that time when I was supposed to be in OCF, I was tucking into a yummy dinner spread of nasi lemak, grilled chicken, stir fried vege, and soup at Jessie's place. We had black glutinous rice and mooncakes ( Green tea, lotus paste and taro flavour ) for dessert as well. I have been wanting to spend time with them since we returned from Sydney but no time till yesterday. But I left after dinner cos I didnt wanted to miss out on fellowship with OCFers. Almost lost my way to aacc. Firstly cos I havent been there for a while and secondly it was dark. But God still brought me there safely. I came timely to catch the Ecamp trailer.. and fellowship..

Anyway yesterday I had fun the WHOLE day. hehe..Taken lots of photos also.. Waiting to upload on comp..

Time to get back to work!

Thursday, October 05, 2006

I m sick again.. My immune system has been really bad.. The weather these days is crazy too.. yesterday was actually abt 33 degrees and it was shockingly HOT that I had to go out in shorts and I still sweat, this is how bad it is N today its super windy. My head is still turning now considering braving the tornado just now.. Almost got myself blown away. It isnt a joke! Its true! I even saw a big size man hiding behind the tree to avoid the wind. Can U believe it?

--

The last few days I have been staying up till late. Starting to do some revision. I hate to panic at the last minute so got to start now. However there is this sense of insecurity in me which I know is actually present in everyone else. Its the exam fear factor haiz.. There is just too much to cover just praying hard that I can retain all in my head and complete everything in time.

Now I really need to focus. Its just slightly less than 2 months then I will be home. I yearn for this time of rest after being here for so long. My heart is looking forward to the mission trip and everything else but there is exams just before that. I want to try my best. No No.. Not want but I will and I have to.. But now I have got to prepare my study timetable n fit everything in first..

--

I did some christmas shopping for the Christmas Operation Child yesterday. Bought some nice stuff for my little gal. The girly stuff that I liked as a child.. stuff like a little diary ( its pink and with a little lock ), markers, korean candy ( very colourful and tempting), and some daily necessities.

Just want to give to the little one just a little of what God has blessed me with! Hopefully it will bring a smile on her face and the understanding of the Father's love.

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

Sorry guys, there wont be much updates from now on..till end of my exams that is till 13th Nov.. I have too much stuff to focus on.. Sorry.. Probably just something short every now and then..

Saturday, September 30, 2006

Yesterday was a self declared public holiday. I gave myself the excuse that due to my jabs which gave me some discomfort. But I was uncomfortable and my mind couldnt concentrate due to the pain and stiffness. I rested but I have some aches still but not serious so no worries at all. And this morning I feel so hot as in like warm till now. I dun think I am sick. Just that my temperature is really odd. Everyone is wearing jackets n there I am in short sleeve and I still feel warm. Thats weird!Worse still, people around me say that they are cold. Then I was like.. err.. but I feel hot!

I was supposed to go for more jabs today but I didnt in the end cos I felt that my body couldnt take it. But I dun think I can drag any longer. Will try to get it quick though... probably next week.. I am scared of jabs..

Thursday, September 28, 2006

Today was an interesting day for me. I had a medical appointment. I am not sick. Just needed to take some jabs prior to the mission trip. Feeling abit dizzy now. Had a blood test today to test for mumps. measles and rubella. I have taken the jabs when I was a baby but the doctor insisted on checking if I still had immunity to it. After blood test, she decided on her OWN to proceed to give me a few jabs for Diphtheria, Tetanus and Typhoid. After the jabs, she told me I will experience pain on the jab spots tmr. She should have told me before that. Argh! Nevermind. Just that now I can feel some pain and stiffness.

Tmr there is round 2! Got to make a trip to the Chest Clinic along North Terrace for a jab of BCG! I wasnt jabbed at sch at 12 cos my immune system was good then but now need to take some precautions to minimise risk! And round 3 next thursday to review the blood test results to see if I need more jabs!

The doctor was quite funny. Female doctor from Uni. Before she took blood from me, the following conversation took place.

Doc: Will u faint at the sight of blood?
Pris: err .. No!
Doc: Good, I wont have time to help if u do ( There is a long queue outside so imagine how fast she finish all her jabs! )

Yeah thats the highlight of the day!

--

Reached home to see one msn message from Yoshi!

It says " Exam timetable is out! "

So obviously I checked ..

Immunology -- 6th Nov
Genetics -- 8th Nov
Chemistry -- 13th Nov

Then I will be done for this year... time to study..

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

William and I spoke yesterday. He shared with me some stuff. He mentioned that many times we as humans always run to something physical first. And God becomes second choice and he himself had such times. I guess we r weak. We need someone physically present. But today, without thinking I chose to run to God first. Isnt it amazing? God knows my thoughts and my words even before they come to my mind or speak them. Something clouded my thoughts this morning but its over now.

During prayer meet yesterday, I had a good time sharing with addielle. A dear sister whom I respect and learn from. Just caught up with her on the daily things. I shared with her much that is on my heart and she prayed with me and encouraged me. Such a sister is precious in my sight and annointed by God. Her grace, her love is beyond description.

I saw the sms from Laza this morning when I woke up. I am encouraged by him. It is so timely. I see God's hand and his favour on us. He alone can make all things possible and everything beautiful.

" I am praying for you and ur team Priscilla. Be courageous and fight the good fight! May God lead, empower and protect you!"

My mission comm is having meeting today from afternoon till night. I am blessed to be amongst people passionate about God. Do pray for them!

Deuteronomy 31:6

"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you."

Monday, September 25, 2006

The last 24 hours, I have been mugging on my essay. I still have a little editing and referencing left which I am going to leave it for later cos its really getting into me. But it will be over soon but mean while I shall upload the pictures from our OCF AU 50th Anniversary. It is so much more enjoyable then doing my essay..argh!!
Commemorating AU 50th Anniversary
The next series of pictures coming up.. Lunch after church.. hey hey.. Been taking a lot of photos.. actually not me.. its SAMUEL!!!

Sunday, September 24, 2006

Saturday, September 23, 2006

My laptop is finally back with me last night. Surviving without it is really hard. That means no internet, cant do assignment, cant check emails basically cannot do anything, kinda unsettled. Everything seems hanging in the air. But praise God, Danny has managed to fix it. Thanks a million man! I am relieved. Really I am with thanksgiving in my heart and glory all unto God. I had a busy week. I came back from Sydney on Wednesday and schedule has been hectic since then. No.. I should say.. it has been hectic all these while. The Sydney trip is fruitful. I learnt a lot and seeing them so enthusiastic labouring for the Lord really gets me onboard with them. Aaron passed me some cds on chinese sermons. Got to listen to them soon. My chinese standard has been degrading since 2 years ago and now I have to figure that out again! But its alright I guess cos Desiree is around haha.. our chinese teacher and fellow warrior! There is much to learn about the Thai language as well along with all my other portfolios. But I am enjoying every minute of this. Its so exciting!!!!

I went for picnic with my coursemates on thursday. It was a sunny day for a picnic. Perfect weather at Botanic gardens. We hardly have the opportunity to hang out as a whole group together cos our schedules are too tight. Now is our mid term break. There is a little time for enjoyment but not much still. Exams are coming in 6 weeks time. Its time to get myself prepared again. I dun wan all that stress when its drawing too near. But let me finished my 2 assignments first then I will start.

I met up with Tracy and her brother on thursday too. Had a late lunch with them. They were here to visit adelaide and Me but seriously I wanted to bring them sightseeing but I couldnt due to other committments and I was dead tired since I came back and I just handed up an assignment that day and another 2 looming the skies next week. Its really time to get started before panic kicks in again..haha..

I really got to have breakfast n start cracking on work..

* My hp has some problem ( Both my Three phone and the prepaid.. the Three phone I dunno whats wrong..just cannot switch on at all and the prepaid one obviously has no credit.. uncontactable for now.. sorry)

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

These stories are a demostration of how God can turn our lifes around.

Spend time going to the links. Its worth it!

A Time to Die ( http://www.au.omf.org/content.asp?id=35462 )

Sompit put the gun in her handbag, climbed onto her motorbike, and began the slow deliberate journey to her death.

Outreach to the outcast ( http://www.au.omf.org/content.asp?id=35443)

A church reaches beyond class and tribal barriers to the outcast and the HIV positive

Serving the Spirits ( http://www.au.omf.org/content.asp?id=35450 )

A former witch doctor finds faith

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

I have been meditating on this song since thursday night.. singing it in the airport.. on the plane.. when I am not with anyone.. at home.. during shopping.. God's presence is simply all around me.. He is with me everywhere I go.. People gave me strange looks but I wasnt concerned at all.. God is pleased thats what matters..

This song comprises of God's promises to me and my response to Him.. I just love the lyrics..

Cover Me

Cover me, Lord my God,
And lead me into your presence,
My soul relieved, Trials may come,
And darkness upon me, But still
Your hand it guides me

My saving grace, My one embrace,
My first true love, I will exalt thee

I love You, Jesus I thank You,
For your hand that covers me

I will worship You, I will worship You
I will worship You My blessed saviour.

Monday, September 18, 2006

I reflected on my priorities.

There is a neccesity to make some changes.

So now it would be :

1. God
2. Studies
3. Family and Self ( Including health )
4. Mission Trip N Ministry ( Includes friends )
Yesterday I visited St Barnabas Church. The church service is conducted in a different way cos its of a different domination but that doesnt matter at all. I enjoyed with service without the slightest doubt. There was sharing by Liz Burns who has come back from a recent mission trip. God's timing is forever perfect. Her experience is valuable n I learnt much from her sharing. I saw the hunger of the people. The joy on their faces when they recieved their first bible. I saw how Liz broke the barriers and God's work in her and through her. Its great. After service I caught up with many Sydney OCFers, spent quality time together. Bonded over lunch and fellowship at Clarence's place. His place is really beautiful.. a condominium facing the sea. The scenery is beyond description. Very much the whole day was spent at their place ( play Risk, cards, cook dinner n shopping too cos there is factory outlets beside their place n the things r so cheap..serious.. )cos he is leaving with his wife to America on work purposes soon.

Saturday I met up with Daniel as well.. After a few months.. We went to fish market n tucked ourselves in OYSTERS, SASHIMI and FISH PLATTER.. so yummy..
I was mad this morning.. I got to know something which I was excluded cos I am in Sydney.. Its a joke.. really it is.. I guess.. being away = being forgotten. Reality it is.. I shall not bother myself with that.. My heart is set on the mission trip and I know it involves a lot of sacrifises .. it may seem like minor sacrifises at one look.. but on further look.. I know its not something minor.. Actually I wan very much to go for convention this year but I cant.. its a struggle within me which noone can see but God alone.. I have chosen to set that aside.. this is just one of the many.. n more are on my way..

I met up with my comm over the past weekend.. Vivian and Aaron its my first time meeting them but they are really warm and loving people who put me at ease.. We are like family..discussing..praying..laughing together.. Now is still our beginning stage of planning but all of us are enthusiastic abt it.. its the fire within us.. we have distributed our portfolios..

Many of us are taking more than 1 portfolio. For myself, I will be taking 3 portfolios. One of them in charge by me and the other 2 larger portfolios shared. Its good to share portfolio. Good to have someone to discuss with. I will be doing the prayer points from now till the end of the trip on a weekly basis and sending them to my comm for prayer. The other 2 portfolios are ( reporter/photographer) by Leanne n myself and also teaching by Vivian and me. I will be preparing a lot of this trip from this day forward so please pray for us if u can. It means I have to forgo some stuff even though I really want to be part of. I have to ignore whatever comments people pass on me ( otherwise life is going to get hard if I listen to everyone ). Following Christ is never easy.. Denying myself each day. .

Matthew 16:24

Then Jesus said to his disciples, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.

There was much sharing during our meeting.. sharing our expectations, hopes n reasons why we want to be part of this team. I am inspired by them, really I am. I see disciples of Christ and the hope of bringing the Gospel to those who have not heard.

Saturday, September 16, 2006

I landed in Sydney yesterday morning. The feeling is like coming home. I was very comfortable during my last stay. I feel so much at home with the OCFers here. Meeting them once again has brought back all these memories. Though this time my stay is short but I know it will be fruitful. Yesterday cos most of them r busy with stuff ( they are not having holidays yet.. I understand but they are around for me when I needed help which already warms my heart.. I am not expecting more.. ). I bumped around city area, paddy's, pitt street n was suprisingly not lost..haha.. in a way its an achievement cos I am ALWAYS lost.. well..its sad but thats the truth..I am bad at directions.. then after that dropped by sam's office before we went for dinner with Linus at Super Bowl. Its familiar place, familiar people, familiar food. I had a great meal. So full until the 3 of us had to move so slowly after we got out from the restaurant.. but we still went for dessert at passionflower ( Thanks Linus ).. the dessert there is beyond description..how I wish they can open a branch in adelaide.. it is that good..

Had a long chat with Sam when we came home.. Havent seen her for 2 months.. I have so much to tell her.. dunno y.. maybe cos we just connect well with each other..

In an hour's time I will be meeting Daniel.. It will be quality time.. It is gonna be a busy day.. Finally meeting my comm tonight.. till late..
I am at Sam's place now. Both Jiamin and her have gone for AGM. The quietness of this house and the album being played, the lyrics, God's Spirit filled my heart. God is in this place. Its something so joyous that words can never express it. This joy is meant to be shared n not just keep within me. The thought that God placed in my heart since thursday was once again refreshed by him on this morning. He has been repeatedly telling me the same thing over the last 2 days n now I choose to do wat he is telling me. Thursday I went to Edge Conference with my connect group. That day, God spoke to me particularly on 2 people. Both of them whom God wants me to reach out too. One of them is close to me but the other one is not. But it doesnt matter at all. Something is forming in my mind. Something I know which will come to pass soon because God's hand is in it.

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

My computer is going for repair tmr.. severely sick.. infested with 46 viruses.. dun ask me y.. I also dunno.. Currently using Jega's computer to do my assignments.. Thanks so much..

I will be away in Sydney from friday till wed.. wont be blogging much I guess.. dun miss me.. I know u guys will..haha..

Monday, September 11, 2006

My laptop is sick.. So m I..Hopefully it doesnt hang on me anytime soon..

Sunday, September 10, 2006

Yesterday at G's place, we had a discussion of time management..Just a few of us... then Deb asked this question that struck me..

What r ur priorities? If I were to ask u to list ur priorities.. How would u list them? What comes as most important and so on..

I listened to all of them as they shared .. great insight gained..

So I just want to know how does everyone prioritize.. What is the postion of God, family, studies, ministry, self, friends and recreation in ur life?

Saturday, September 09, 2006

Just Want to share something about Time Management which I have learnt a while ago..

"Time management is really life management, personal management. It is really taking control over the sequence of events. Time management is control over what you do next. And you are always free to choose the task that you will do next. Your ability to choose betweeen the important and unimportant is the key determinant of your success in life and work."

Dr Joseph Mercola
Author of the Total Health Program

General Tips for using time effectively:

* Set Priorities
* Be Flexible
* Keep projects on the move
* Alternate activities
* Do all things actively
* Review and acknowledge progress
* Spread the load
* Seek help
* Beware of time bandits

I am still learning.. hope it helps u guys.. There are some more stuff.. for those interested..please approach me personally.. too much to write here..haha..
At this time next week, I will be in Sydney.. I am excited to visit the OCFers there again.. After 2 months.. I miss them.. seriously.. I enjoyed my last trip there, the fellowship I treasure.. this time round..I will only be there for 5 days and all days are almost booked out.. Going to meet Daniel also.. Havent seen him for a while.. finally meeting him again.. This time found I will be staying at Samantha's place. Thanks alot dear for accomodating me.. The main reason for this trip is to meet up with my mission comm.. Please keep us in prayer and also now for some reason.. I am having sore throat also.. * cough..cough..cough * Hopefully I can recover before I go Sydney.. there is so much to be accomplished there.. My heart is all jumping for all that God is doing through us.. This year I m missing AU AGM as well as Kairos.. My disappointment but at this point of my life I choose to put the upcoming mission trip of highest importance.. For those who will be around in adelaide.. just want to encourage u guys to go for kairos.. Ur life will never be the same.. I was there last year.. In that place where I saw people crying out for God.. I can still remember many things that happened there.. Its God's appointed time.. So please please go for it..

One particular thing I remember last kairos was the final part where we went into a hall in aacc church.. I see remember Calvin was the one initiating it but God's spirit was so strongly felt in that place.. a few leaders with their candles lit.. they went around lighting each of our candles.. and the flame was passed along until all our candles were lit.. this action symbolises that we r flaming the love of God from generation to generation.. to pass on our knowledge n experience to the younger generation.. in that place many of us cried to God.. we just hugged each other n spoke words of encouragement.. I can still remember the people whom I hugged but I wont mention here.. It is just still so vivid in my mind as though it happened yesterday.. but no.. that was last year.. So my encouragement to all .. Go for it.. Run after Christ..

Take one step forward and allow God to do the rest.. U will be amazed..
Pick it Up

I was blind, now I see
Love has got a hold of me
Now I sing' cause I am free

So I'm laying down my life
and I'm taking up my cross

I'm taking up my cross
Laying down my life
All for the Glory of Your Name

I' m living my whole life
All for You Jesus
Taking up my cross everyday
Pick it up

I was lost, now I'm found
Put my feet on solid ground
Now I sing' cause I am free

I choose to stand for my generation
I choose to stand for my generation

I'm taking up my cross
I'm taking up my cross

Thursday, September 07, 2006

Oh ya.. I forgot to share something abt my practical today.. I ACTUALLY DISSECTED A MOUSE!!! I could see all the internal organs like spleen, lungs, heart, liver, lymph nodes and so on.. Its so sadistic.. argh.. But thats my practical la.. cant help it.. Will upload the pictures soon.. Pictures speak a thousand words..
Guess wat!!! My assignments for this week are all completed.. to some of u ..it may not be anything much but to me its something.. I call that a miracle.. cos this week was my most busy week at Uni.. Most of my weeks have at least 6 assignments.. but this week was 8 assignments and with quiz.. so much to memorise..Praise God its all over and all went well.. my quiz inclusive though there were some parts of it, I kind of try to bluff through ..haha.. but on the whole it was good.. I was feeling stressful very much the whole of this week cos there was too much to be done n I didnt have enough time. I hardly have much sleep but I was still happy because I know God will bring me through it as he always does. One thing that amazes me is that though being so busy, the time I have for God each day remains good quality ( God always reminds me to spend time with him )..Thats the only time of the day I spend in quietness n be still before HIM.. He never fails to remind me of his greatness everyday.. Each new day he renews me and opens my eyes to the great things he has for me.. I love to dwell in his presence forever...

In the past ( a long time ago I mean ), I have always thought that when I am busy, I would probably forget about God.. But no I did not.. I remembered HIM all the more ( He consistently reminded me of his presence in my life, all blessings he brought into my life and the circumstances and situations he brought me through) and I drew my strength from HIM.. He has become so evident in my life that he is part of everything I do.. I am glad he has brought me this far.. cos I know its just impossible to do it using my own strength.. I am just so joyful now..

This weekend is gonna be exciting for me.. Going to do some shopping ( Havent been shopping for a long time.. u know why..cos everytime my lesson ends.. the shops also close.. argh..in a way save money but then..).. Also going to adelaide show with my dearest coursemates on sat ( Heard there were really cheap goodies bags n the fruit wine and cheese is awesome.. so must go..anyway only once a year ).. then having time management discussion.. followed by dinner with connect group.. I miss them..miss the fellowship..

But I will still make time to study like I always do.. haha.. Next week isnt so busy.. would have time for some revision..

Tuesday, September 05, 2006

Someone just asked me my opinion on something..

Here is the anonymous question:

What do u guys think of staying in a co-ed house as in guys n gals staying together? Is in acceptable?

What do everyone say?

Monday, September 04, 2006

At this moment, I should be studying furiously for my Immunology Quiz tmr. But my brain is so saturated with all the B cells, T cells and lymphoid tissues.. haha.. So just take a break first.. no point going insane over a quiz..haha..keep cool..

Yesterday some of us went for Tina's Baptism over at Paradise Church. Its my second time to that church. I went once last year when they had a concert. Havent been back there since. Its too far la.. Tina was in the same bible study group as me last year when I was co-leading with Kah wai.. I have seen her grown so much.. not only in her knowledge of the Word but also deepen her relationship and love for our Father.. I just feel so encouraged everytime I see her. I m blessed to be able to witness her baptism, her proclaimation of her love for our Father. Just feel so happy for her .. I believe there would be much more installed for her.

Just want to thank God for Tina's step of obedience.

Sunday, September 03, 2006

Yesterday's NPMM is awesome. Its a great time of prayer and my spirit is united with my Jesus and my brothers and sisters in Christ. Truely, I was absorbed in that atmosphere, I can feel the presence of God even right now. I can feel God's power. The joy and peace he brought me is unmeasurable and intense. He alone brings satisfaction and salvation. Yesterday during Aunty Merrilyn's sharing, my mind was on the lost souls everyday wondering pass us. They are the lost without the salvation and peace that I have within me, my heart was wrenched with pity and sorrow. What good is it to achieve everything yet forfeit their soul. Pointless absolutely pointless. My heart goes out to the people who are looking for worldly desires because deep down in my heart. I know that their heart is empty. Their soul is void. This emptyness can only be filled by Jesus no matter how much you try to cheat yourself. I long to be able to do sth for them.

For the first prayer, I prayed with Moses, Samuel and Aunty Merrilyn. A spirit guided prayer for Geelong. After the prayer I told Aunty Merrilyn about the mission trip which I am about to go for. I could see Jesus in her eyes. The eyes of joy and blessing. She has been my inspiration, she has flamed my passion to go forward for missions. A living example who deserves my respect. A lady flowing with the love of Christ. A true example whom I look to. I have had missions on my mind since I was 16 years old and the passion was flamed last year and once again this year. Clearly, I know that this is what God wants me to do. Its not a rash decision, its something my soul longs for and its something I really want to do. Frankly speaking, I have not desired anything as much before. But this time, my heart is determined, my heart is convicted by the Holy spirit. After the decision was made, the peace of God like a dove rested on me.

Dennis, Aaron and myself prayed for some countries and missionary as well. I chose to pray for Thailand. As I was praying for Thailand, my spirit was touched by God once again, as I pray I just cried. Tears flowed n I just wanted to reach out to them, to bring the Gospel to them. I never knew I could do outreach but now I know I am empowered by the Holy Spirit to do all that God commanded.

We prayed for the OCF centres, the countries and the missionaries whom we support and my leader Siew Wai prayed over me as well. With Aunty Merrilyn wrapping her arms around my waist, I was overwhelmed by the touch of the Holy Spirit. Its His annointing, His annointing. Nothing can bring such conviction over me except Him.

It was just awesome. A lot of things happened yesterday which cannot be described in words.. Beyond comprehesion, beyond description ...

Matthew 28:18-20 (New International Version)

18Then Jesus came to them and said, "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. 19Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age."

Friday, September 01, 2006

l had a great day except for some minor hiccups.. I went to see an advisor today to learn more about time management. All along I thought I managed my time well but today I realised that I didnt.. or perhaps I should say, some of my time is not effectively spent.. I m glad I went to find out for myself.. not just for myself.. but its something that I can share with others for everyone's benefit.. it was good..

After that session, I went off to OCF, prayed with Melissa...shared some stuff with her, really glad to know her better today.. she encouraged me..really.. through sharing and how God is working in her life.. Our God is an amazing God...I shared some stuff with a few people today.. what God is doing.. It was more of heart to heart talk to a few people.. I wont mention names here.. its time well spent..

I liked the worship and sharing today.. The worship part I was so absorbed in the songs that I was oblivious to everything.. just immersed in the words..the lyrics.. and the sharing.. its good.. inspiring..Wei Jian brought up stuff that I didnt focus on .. Its God's annointing on him.. Glory to God...

I am home now.. excited for NPMM tmr when we can pray together as a whole for the different OCF centres around Australia as well as the missionaries we support..

And tmr is Jasmine's birthday, Happy Birthday Gal!!!

Cya tmr..haha.. NPMM..
Many many years ago, I read this poem in one of my devotional books which deeply touched my heart.. Just thought it would be good to share with all.. It has always encouraged me and lifted my spirit.. God brought this into my heart once again today.. I am not depressed, neither upset or stressed.. I just want to share what encouraged me then.. hopefully it encourages my dearest..

Never Alone

I've seen the lightning flashing,
And heard the thunder roll,
I've felt sin's breakers dashing,
Trying to conquer my soul;
I've heard the voice of Jesus,
Telling me still to fight on,
He promised never to leave me,
Never to leave me alone.

The world's fierce winds are blowing,
Temptations are sharp and keen;
I have a peace in knowing
My Saviour stands between;
He stands to shield me from danger,
When earthly friends are gone.
He promised never to leave me,
Never to leave me alone.

When in affliction's valley,
I'm treading the road of care,
My Saviour helps me to carry
My cross when heavy to bear,
My feet entangled with briars,
Ready to cast me down;
My Saviour whispered his promise,
Never to leave me alone.

-- Anonymous

Hebrews 13:5

"Never will I leave you;
never will I forsake you."

Ephesians 6

The Armor of God

10Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power.
11Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. 12For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.
13Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.
14Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place,
15and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace.
16In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one.
17Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.
18And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.