Exams r finally over.. The past 3 weeks seems like at endless nightmare initially.. scary.. now its over.. but awaiting the results is more of the torture.. its like facing the reality in 2 weeks.. I m fearful of it.. really scared of facing it.. I did my best this semester but I feel so negative of my results.. I dunno.. I have been praying praying.. the peace comes n the devil knocks later n fear creeps back.. I feel so useless.. Its something so inside of me.. the feeling of worthlessness... Just losing confidence of things.. I need people to encourage me to support me in this journey.

There are some people I particularly remember during this tough journey. My study group keith, yoshi, hubert, bruce, william, sally, YJ, Paul, they have been with me on this journey.. People that I really appreciate.. They r just so dear to my heart. They have seen me when I m down.. seen me when I was worn out n on the verge of giving up. I m glad to have this bunch of friends.. Always thank and Praise God for them.

On the day of my first paper, I am touched to have the company of Moses, Leeping n Yoshi who walked me to the exam hall.. the time they take to accompany me comforted my anxious heart.. Thanks guys! I am so glad u went the extra mile for me.. It was crucial that day.. serious no joke!

My first paper was a horror shock for all of us.. So horrible that when I think of it now.. I shiver.. For all I have written in my 3 papers.. I have absolutely no idea how much is it worth. Thinking abt it now is purely useless n destructive to my life.. I dun wan it to be this way.. It should never be like this.. I hate it.. All I can do now is to pray continuously and I trust that its in God's hands. His plan for me will enfold slowing..Beautifully because I am precious in his eyes, his beloved daughter who can run to him at any time.. I recieved some sms during the exam period from OCFers n I was particularly encouraged by addielle..The words she used I always felt so uplifted. Its like God speaking to me face to face. Especially the sms she sent on Wed morning when I was at the point of breaking.. Suddenly I saw the light of God shining through her words.. I believe she is the vessel used powerfully in my life by God at that moment.. Thank you so much sis.. This period, I felt closer n more belonged to the family of God stronger than before.. Many days when I woke up.. I could feel HIM in my room literally.. Its unbelievable.. But its true.. Exams are actually a good thing..

This exam period I was staying out a lot with friends.. firstly with yoshi then west terrace then in the village with Leny until I became really sick last thursday until Sunday.. Its a bad time to fall sick..Each day was feeling worse than before.. though I rested most of the day.. took all my pills.. kept warm.. drink hot water.. but still ended up feeling horrible.. my brain literally couldnt function at all.. couldnt think.. once I think a bit.. headache comes back.. fever on n off.. coupled with flu n sore throat n that was enough.. I was just plainly fragile.. Sad.. but that period of time.. I can see the concern n love of many.. Thanks guys!

Now exams are finally over.. I am going to sdyney soon.. 4th July.. Be back on 12th July.. Going for Bluemountain camp.. I am excited abt it.. I wish it can come soon..